Types of People I Hate

Types Of People I Hate

I was actually going to make this a 'Things I Hate' thing, but then I realised that I hate a lot of things, so I decided to split it up into people and things.

1. people who say 'OH YOU HAVE A PIMPLE' Obviously. i know it's there. I spent 20 minutes this morning trying to get rid of it, and this genius is there like 'HAR HAR HAR YOU HAVE A PIMPLE.' I know this, so shut the hell up.

2. people who demand things of me. 'HEY, DO YOUR HAIR DIFFERENTLY TOMORROW.' or the more 'subtle' one 'I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE WITHOUT MAKEUP. DON'T WEAR MAKEUP TOMORROW.' Last I checked, you're not an authority figure. You are the most boring and obnoxious person I know. You're not Beyonce. You're not Vogue, stop telling me what I should do with my face.

3. This is mostly girls but girls who laugh like *High pitched laugh*. I cannot. What are you trying to do? Scare away dogs? Call Batman?

4. On the other end of the spectrum, girls who laugh like this *Manly snorty laugh*

5. Guys who flex. ALL THE TIME. Just like, I failed my maths test *flex* My girlfriend broke up with me *flex* I'm in jail *flex* News flash, it doesn't look cool.

6. People who are like 'Why are you scared of my dog? He's soooo nice.' Yeah the dog's nice, I'm not. Get it away from me, I came to your house to see you, not your giant golden retriever. If I want dog fur and slobber on me, I'll get a dog. (Yes, R, yes)

7.  People who dress in overly bright clothing. What are you doing? Stop. This is not the Circus Soleil. You have no reason to dress like that.

8. People who complain when I chew ice. I love chewing ice. Stop telling me to stop.

9. Girls who freak out when sex is mentioned. You were there when we had sex ed in the 6th year, why are you screaming because sex was mentioned? I don't get it, because you scream about it, but there are guys asking me if I want porn. I don't get it.

10. People who are so obvious about your crush. Say I'm with a friend or whatever and we see my crush. I'm acting normally, but that friend starts hitting my arm and giggling. Like shut up, it's my crush, I'm not freaking out. Why are you?

11. People who say black isn't a colour. So what, I'm wearing a colourless shirt? Colourless implies that it's white. I'm not wearing white. Am I nude? What...?? Black is a colour, I'm an art student, trust me.

12. People who keep touching my laptop. Stop. I know it's a touchscreen, but you know what else is a touch screen? Your iPhone, your iPad, your Samsung Galaxy S5, your iPod, your mini iPad. Why are you touching my laptop? Because now I have to clean your filty fingerprints off of my screen and trust me, if I get a proper fingerprint, I will use it against you.

13. People who think 'I win you' is a proper sentence. I win you means that I won you in a game, meaning that as of now, you are my property. What you mean is 'I beat you' but considering your grammar, you don't deserve to win at all.

14. People who think theatre isn't an actual thing, but sports are. Sure, you can play sports. But don't ever say that theatre isn't valid and that it's stupid. You don't know what it's like to memorise loads of lines, perform them on stage, remain in character the whole time and not freak out and stutter or run off stage. You don't, so don't act like you're better than me because you dribble a basketball around a court.

15. Girls who constantly post sad things on facebook or instagram or whatever. Your facebook is supposed to be about your life, where do quotes about love come in? You're sad? Really? Then don't get sad when I remove you from my friends list because I don't want to handle your emotions when logging on. It's social media, not 'let's post this sad screencap from that movie I've never seen but I saw on tumblr.'

16.  People who can't stand the sound of scissors snipping. I love that sound but it got so bad then when I was in third grade, a boy complained to the teacher that I kept doing that so the teacher banned scissor snipping. That boy went home with a bleeding lip.

17. People who claim that physical strength is why men are superior to women. Why is physical strength so important anyway? Most of us don't have jobs where physical strength is necessary. Hey dude, we're not building log cabins and burning witches anymore.

18. People who tell me I can't do something because I'm a girl. Like... I can't go there because I'm a girl? I can't say that because I'm a girl? Don't tell me what I can and can't do.

19. People who are so infuriating and stubborn. They're like 'I'm older, I know better. You have to believe me. I will stand here arguing with you until you believe me.' when I'm trying not to rip their throats out.

20. When people join a fandom because of a movie. Enough said.
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21. When people say they're something because of a hot actor. In the Harry Potter fandom, I have come across so many fans who're like 'I'm totes a Slytherin because Tom Felton is soooo hawt.' like.... that's not a valid reason. I'm an actual Slytherin, and my taste in men has nothing to do with my sorting. That just makes me look like a crazy fan girl because I'm a Slytherin and since 'Tom Felton is soooo hawt' that's all I can be.

22. When people ask me 'Why's your English so good?' when they realise I'm not American. I don't know, why aren't you dead yet?

23. When brilliant books are turned into a horrible love story where everyone's white and it's about love. That's it. That's the story. Sorry people who loved the books, it is now a romantic comedy. And now millions will join the fandom thinking it's only about love.

There's more but I figured I should stop since.... I don't need more death threats. Cheerio.